by Jennifer Karchmer
How long have you been dreaming about opening a restaurant? How about quitting your day job and travelling around the world? Maybe you’re still thinking about getting that yoga certification? Or wondering when you’ll get published even though you’ve stuffed 50 pages of your memoir in a drawer because you’re worrying it’s not any good?
We all have lifelong dreams. They drive our passions and feed our imaginations. For some, we lock them away (like the manuscript) because we think they are out of reach, too lofty, or “crazy.”
It’s easy to get discouraged when you share your vision with friends or family only to get shot down with: “It costs too much. Your head is in the clouds. That will never happen. It’s too expensive. It will take forever.” On and on those negative thoughts permeate your daily life and soon enough, the dream bubble is burst and we truly believe that our dreams are as far away as the sun.
How long have you been dreaming about opening a restaurant? How about quitting your day job and travelling around the world? Maybe you’re still thinking about getting that yoga certification? Or wondering when you’ll get published even though you’ve stuffed 50 pages of your memoir in a drawer because you’re worrying it’s not any good?
We all have lifelong dreams. They drive our passions and feed our imaginations. For some, we lock them away (like the manuscript) because we think they are out of reach, too lofty, or “crazy.”
It’s easy to get discouraged when you share your vision with friends or family only to get shot down with: “It costs too much. Your head is in the clouds. That will never happen. It’s too expensive. It will take forever.” On and on those negative thoughts permeate your daily life and soon enough, the dream bubble is burst and we truly believe that our dreams are as far away as the sun.
So how do you get your dreams off the ground,
ignore the naysayers and make them reality?
It’s a mindset, and those who are fortunate enough to have reached their goals or who are living their dreams didn’t get there because of a big bank account or supernatural powers.
Hiring a personal coach is a wonderful way to help quell destructive thoughts. By working one-on-one with a coach – someone who’s objective, compassionate and focused on you every week – you can gain a new perspective on what’s been holding you back and suppress those irrational fears that serve only as roadblocks.
Each coach is a little different: consider the life coach, the business coach, the personal coach, the writing coach. Some work with you online, by phone or by a Skype call. Figure out which method works best for you and choose accordingly.
Think of coaching as brainstorming with an impartial visitor who you meet with once or twice a week. You can get the best results when you connect over several weeks or months so you can build together and see progress through measurable goals.
Hiring a personal coach is a wonderful way to help quell destructive thoughts. By working one-on-one with a coach – someone who’s objective, compassionate and focused on you every week – you can gain a new perspective on what’s been holding you back and suppress those irrational fears that serve only as roadblocks.
Each coach is a little different: consider the life coach, the business coach, the personal coach, the writing coach. Some work with you online, by phone or by a Skype call. Figure out which method works best for you and choose accordingly.
Think of coaching as brainstorming with an impartial visitor who you meet with once or twice a week. You can get the best results when you connect over several weeks or months so you can build together and see progress through measurable goals.
Business coach Theo Mahy works with clients worldwide. Photo courtesy Theo Mahy. Digging Deep
Theo Mahy is a business coach in New York. Originally from France, Mahy came to the US to help other French entrepreneurs relocate to the States and find new ventures and grow their businesses. He’s since branched out and works with a variety of clients, from college administrators, to restaurant owners, to athletic company CEOs to freelance writers.
“It’s like digging deep,” Mahy says. By giving yourself at least one hour each week, you can “let go and work on yourself and create value just around you.” Mahy himself worked regularly with a coach when he was student. It was a great way to set up measurable goals and, most of all, stay accountable. When we know we have to report to someone, we’re more likely to do the work, he says. Those sessions, “help you see yourself as powerful.” And who doesn’t want to powerful?
So how do you know it’s the right time?
If you’ve considered working with a coach, then you’re ready. Just having the idea percolate in your mind means it’s important to you and that your dreams are poised to become reality. Somewhere in there is a block but you’re open to sharing your most intimate fears and doubts with an objective third-party.
Your BFF and your mom lend a listening ear, but a professional coach will give you the good, the bad and the ugly truth about your mindset.
So what is holding you back. Perhaps it’s opening up to a stranger? The dent in your pocketbook? Does the thought of actually achieving your dreams seem scary?
Here are some common fears and ways to overcome them:
The bottom line: if you’re even thinking about working with a coach to reach your dreams, then the time is now to find the right person who can guide you and help keep you accountable. Why wait any longer to be able to say, “I have fulfilled one of my lifelong dreams.”
Theo Mahy is a business coach in New York. Originally from France, Mahy came to the US to help other French entrepreneurs relocate to the States and find new ventures and grow their businesses. He’s since branched out and works with a variety of clients, from college administrators, to restaurant owners, to athletic company CEOs to freelance writers.
“It’s like digging deep,” Mahy says. By giving yourself at least one hour each week, you can “let go and work on yourself and create value just around you.” Mahy himself worked regularly with a coach when he was student. It was a great way to set up measurable goals and, most of all, stay accountable. When we know we have to report to someone, we’re more likely to do the work, he says. Those sessions, “help you see yourself as powerful.” And who doesn’t want to powerful?
So how do you know it’s the right time?
If you’ve considered working with a coach, then you’re ready. Just having the idea percolate in your mind means it’s important to you and that your dreams are poised to become reality. Somewhere in there is a block but you’re open to sharing your most intimate fears and doubts with an objective third-party.
Your BFF and your mom lend a listening ear, but a professional coach will give you the good, the bad and the ugly truth about your mindset.
So what is holding you back. Perhaps it’s opening up to a stranger? The dent in your pocketbook? Does the thought of actually achieving your dreams seem scary?
Here are some common fears and ways to overcome them:
- Fear: "I’m nervous about opening up to a stranger."
Solution: Do your homework and work with someone who shares your vision. A professional will listen non-judgmentally and keep your information confidential too. Search online for keywords that are important to you (i.e., fitness, dreams, lose weight, travel, etc). Send emails, ask about rates, read up on the coach’s philosophy and see if you’re a match. - Fear: "I can’t afford it."
Solution: You can’t afford not to. It’s a cliché but true. Working with a coach is a long-term investment. What you get out of each session is knowledge and inspiration and practical advice that you will hold onto and use for the rest of your life. Changing your mindset from negative to positive is like money in the bank so start saving today. - Fear: "What if I don’t achieve my goal?"
Solution: But what if you do? Moving to Africa, becoming a best-selling novelist, earning your pilot’s license – does the thought of achieving your lifelong dream give you the butterflies or catapult you to a stratosphere that is impossible to imagine? You need to believe it before you can achieve it (someone said that). Your first step is to accept what you really want is within reach.
The bottom line: if you’re even thinking about working with a coach to reach your dreams, then the time is now to find the right person who can guide you and help keep you accountable. Why wait any longer to be able to say, “I have fulfilled one of my lifelong dreams.”
Jennifer Karchmer is a writing coach and editorial consultant who helps people of all walks of life improve their writing. Check out her Live BIG! session too.
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